I’ve always felt a bit uncomfortable when receiving gifts. It’s not that I don’t appreciate the gesture, but something just doesn’t sit well with me. We can analyze why I’m not such a fan, (maybe I'll write about that another day) but for the purposes of this post, let’s just leave it at gifts are not my thing.
Do you know what does make me feel special though? Words of affirmation. Let me know with words that I am doing something well and I’ll be on cloud 9. Tell me you like the dessert I made or how much you appreciated the gift I gave you, tell me you were so grateful for how I managed that difficult situation or what aspect of my writing you liked, that’s my ticket. Learning my ‘’love language’’ has been invaluable in navigating my relationships and getting my needs met. Take a moment to introspect and ask yourself ‘’what does it for me?’’ What makes you feel cared for and appreciated? If you’re having trouble figuring it out just google ‘love language test’ and it will lead you in the right direction.
The Power of a Thank You
Regardless, of your primary love language, hearing how we are valued is something most of us benefit from. It’s pretty much an across the board, human experience to appreciate being appreciated. In relationships, showing this appreciation is what perpetuates closeness, connection and fuels positivity with in the relationship as a whole. Appreciation can look like the examples I gave above, but it can also be as simple as saying a thank you to your partner. The moment you affirm the work that someone has done or the effort they have put in, whether it is something as small as putting the dirty towel in the wash or as major as shoveling the driveway (if you live in Canada you know what I’m talking about). Gratitude is a beautiful way to show love, appreciation, and allow positivity to seep into your relationship.
Changing the Tone in Your Home
Can you imagine how you might you feel if someone truly took notice of you, the effort you put in, looked you in the eye and said a sincere ‘thank you’? Even a less intense thank you is energy fueling and makes you feel amazing.
The good news is you can bring some of that goodness into your life simply by doing the same. People are naturally inclined to repeat behaviors that are recognized. When you say “thank you,” it encourages your partner to continue contributing in that way to you. You give thanks and you will eventually get thanks too. You can create a language of gratitude with each other that will make your life together smoother and more enjoyable. When you thank your partner for the mundane tasks, you’re not just acknowledging their actions; you’re reinforcing a culture of appreciation leading to a happier home. Gratitude is an attitude
Sign me up ! How do I make this Gratitude attitude happen in my house?!
Simple Ways to Bring Gratitude to Life
Be Specific: Instead of a generic “thanks,” try to be specific. “Thank you for making dinner tonight; it was delicious!” This makes your gratitude feel more genuine.
Leave Notes: A little handwritten note can brighten your partner’s day. Place it somewhere they’ll find it, like in their lunch bag or on the bathroom mirror.
Show It Through Actions: Sometimes actions speak louder than words. Surprise them with their favorite treat or take over a chore they usually do as a thank you for their hard work.
Make it a Habit: Incorporate gratitude into your daily routine. Make it a point to thank each other for the little things every day. This will create a positive cycle of appreciation.
Taking a moment to say thank you for the everyday tasks your partner or family member does can transform your relationships. Gratitude has the ability to turn mundane requests into meaningful connective moments. So, the next time your partner does something—big or small—remember to express your gratitude to them out loud. It will change your relationship!
I’m going to set the ball rolling for you right now. I really appreciate you for taking the time out of your busy schedules to read what I’ve written. Thank you!
Now it's your turn, go on and pass this gratitude attitude forward.
Want to know how we can help you get your relationship to the next level? Learn more about couples therapy or contact us for more information.
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